Neanderthal Poem

Forty thousand years ago,
When Europe was a land of snow,
And mammoths roamed the permafrost,
Two Stone Age hominids got lost.

With ease (both being broad and stocky),
They scrambled over ice all rocky.
A blizzard worse than they could brave,
Made them shelter in a cave.

They'd failed to find a scrap to eat,
The howling snow had got them beat.
They set a fire and sat all day,
Their tummies rumbling in dismay.

'Twas then that one Neanderthal
Looked with hunger at his pal.
Slavering as he licked his lips,
He gazed upon those meaty hips.

Picking up a piece of rock,
He gave his mate a mighty knock.
He cut off slices from the bum,
And on the fire he cooked his chum.

Finishing off the meat he'd served,
He thought a moment and observed:
"No greater love has friend for me,
Who lays his life down for my tea."

(Did starving Neanderthals eat each other?)